'I'm angry and heartbroken - I feel that my daughter has been failed'

SIOBHAN Robb is not speaking to the Antrim Guardian for the first time.

In 2022, she came to our offices, pleading for help for her daughter Caitlin, who had made a number of attempts on her life and was struggling with mental health issues.

She was back again in 2023, when Caitlin had multiple metal staples holding her broken body together after yet another self-harming incident, but she could not find anywhere that would take her daughter in.

But this time, in May 2024, the Antrim Guardian is in Siobhan’s house, being made tea.

Pictures of Caitlin, a beautiful and vivacious young woman, stare down from the mantelpiece.

Because Caitlin is no longer here.

All the warnings that Siobhan made - back then, anonymously - have come to bear.

Now Caitlin’s parents, brother and sister are mourning her loss and Siobhan is angry, claiming her daughter was failed at every turn.

As a teenager in secondary school, Caitlin fell in with a bad crowd. Siobhan and her mother once had to drive to Ballymena to fetch her from a gang who had congregated outside a fast-food restaurant.

Getting older, Caitlin turned to drink and drugs to block out her demons. She could hear voices and see bodies without faces.

She expressed suicidal ideation at some times, then denied it when in front of healthcare professionals, who immediately discharged her.

She carried out multiple incidents of self-harm. On one occasion, she required 109 staples.

Siobhan’s phone is full of pictures that no mother wants to take - multiple photos of her daughter’s injuries, taken as proof of the severity of the situation - but Siobhan says that Caitlin and her family were told that she didn’t meet the criteria for admission, or that funding wasn’t available to send her for residential care in England.

On the rare times she was admitted to specialist units, they were mainly occupied by men and were an unsuitable environment for a young woman with her issues. On her bad days, Caitlin couldn’t make counselling sessions and if she missed three in a row, she was taken off the list.

Like many young women, she got into online spats, often with people who should have known much better and usually defending herself, family or friends.

Her mother claims that the vaccum caused by the lack of access to mental health services has often been filled by under-qualified or maverick practitioners, some of whom Siobhan claims made her daughter’s issues worse.

But Caitlin’s torment did not end there. Her family alleges she was raped last year, in a case that has still not yet to come to court. Siobhan said that she and Caitlin spent hours waiting to be seen at Antrim PSNI station before being sent to the specialist facility at Antrim Area Hospital, The Rowan.

Before she passed away, Caitlin gave statements and filmed an Achieving Best Evidence interview. Clothes were also removed for forensic investigation.

The alleged perpetrator was bailed, but Siobhan claims he has breached his conditions several times, attempting to intimidate Caitlin and her mother in person and via social media.

The latest breach came just a few weeks ago, when a third party sent messages to Siobhan. This, she claims , pushed her daughter over the edge. In the early hours of the morning in late April, Siobhan received two phone calls in quick succession from Caitlin, who had her own flat.

Siobhan was worried, but reminded her daughter that they were due to spend some time together the next day.

“I told her that I would see her in the morning, I was coming to do her hair as we - Caitlin, her sister and I - were going out to get our nails done, as we did often.

“I had taken medication and was not able to drive, but there was something in my gut telling me to call the police to do a mental health check.

“My younger daughter was sitting exams the next morning and I was sitting on the edge of the bed and I saw the police car park outside and I went down, I didn’t want to let them in and upset the wee girl, it was a young male police officer and a woman, but I could see by their faces something was wrong.

“I asked if she was gone, and he said no, but she was very ill.

“We went to Antrim Area Hospital but we were told she was being transferred to the Ulster Hospital in Dundonald and the policeman, who came and sat with me, said ‘I hope wee Caitlin pulls through’.

In the Ulster, Siobhan said that the staff treated her family as their own. They washed and plaited Caitlin’s distinctive red hair every day.

But the swelling in her brain was so severe that every time the doctors tried to reduce medication, she would have seizures - and the family were warned that it was coming time to say their goodbyes.

“I asked if I could put on the last pair of pyjamas that Caitlin bought me and put on some perfume on her and just lie with her. I was worried about hurting her as she was hooked up to so much equipment but they were great, they would let us stay all night if we wanted to.

“I lay beside her and put my arm around her and whispered in her ear and stroked her hair. They told me she was comfortable and in no pain.”

Then the family gathered around the bedside to say their farewells - it was April 30th. But the clock was ticking. Caitlin’s legacy will be that her organs will help others to go on and live their lives, even if she felt that she could not.

“We were told that if she lived for three hours after life support was removed, her organs would no longer be viable, but we were warned that it would likely be much less than that,” said Siobhan.

“We were told that there would be about a five minute window for successful removal and we just said our goodbyes. It’s what Caitlin would have wanted, to know that she was helping someone else.”

Siobhan has been told that both kidneys and Caitlin’s liver have been successfully transplanted so far, with one kidney going to a recipient in Manchester.

“The consultant got down on his knees,” said Siobhan.

“And thanked us as a family, not as a doctor but as a father, for the difference we would be making to the lives of others.”

The family have been sent a letter and a number of golden heart pins to distribute to supporters as a way of thanks.

Siobhan is keen that another part of Caitlin’s legacy is that no parent goes through what she has.

“I would not wish this on my worst enemy,” she said.

“I am angry and heartbroken. I feel that my child was failed. Up until the age of 17 we had support and then by 18, it felt like we were on our own, as if the minute she became an adult, her problems disappeared or I was not listened to as a mother.

“Her social worker also begged for her to be admitted to an appropriate facility, but it was either she didn’t meet the criteria, or there was no funding or the places she went were completely unsuitable for a young women with her issues.

“She either told people she was going to kill herself and she was not taken seriously, or she told people what she thought they wanted to hear and they let her walk out.

“One time we were escorted out of the hospital and the police who were called, couldn’t believe what they were seeing. She got advice like ‘have a cup of tea and a hot bath’.

“Sometimes she was told that the authorities could not engage with her if she was on drink or drugs. She drank to block out her problems but she had not been taking drugs for a long time.

“But because the right mental health services were not available to her, we were recommended other people, who were just full of their own self importance and their own ego. They did not help her at all, in fact they made her worse, but they are still out there proclaiming themselves as experts.

“One day we went to Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services at 4.55pm and were told to go away because the building was closing at 5pm.

“The Northern Trust did offer their condolences. The PSNI phoned my daughter-in-law.

“But the man who she says raped her is still walking around the town as if nothing happened. I just can’t believe it. She was preyed upon in the first place because she was vulnerable.”

But Siobhan is full of praise for the response officers who assisted the family in times of need and to the community of Antrim.

Friends, family and neighbours have rallied round. Caitlin adored her uncle, former Mayor Jim Montgomery and her sister, brother and sister-in-law.

The Parish of Antrim have been a huge support and local restaurants and hotels have supplied food and drink to keep the family going.

Ahead of Caitlin’s burial, Antrim residents helped raise over £4,000 in days towards her funeral costs.

Siobhan said: “Caitlin’s wee friend Kaylee Agnew organised that, it was a lovely thing to do. We go and sit by the grave now together.

“That’s all I do now, I don’t go out, I just go up to the grave. But I am so thankful to the support of the community, everyone else is as angry as I am. And my other kids, they are so clued in, I don’t know what I would do without them.

“I want justice and answers for my daughter and I don’t want anyone else to go through what we have gone through.

“I should not have lost my child in this way. We all begged for help for so long and we never got it.”

Also on Siobhan’s mantelpiece is a picture taken in the hours before Caitlin’s life ebbed away at the Ulster Hospital, surrounded by her loving family.

A daughter’s hand is cradled in her mother’s, their nails done together, just as they always were.

A spokesperson for the PSNI told the Antrim Guardian: “A 29 year old man was arrested on suspicion of rape and sexual assault in the Antrim area on 20th June 2023.

“He was later released on bail to allow for further enquiries to be conducted. The investigation remains ongoing.”

A spokesperson for the Northern Trust said: “While we cannot comment on individual cases, we very much regret that Caitlin’s mother is not satisfied with the care her daughter received from the Northern Health and Social Care Trust, and would encourage her to get in touch so we can address any concerns with her directly.

“This is a tragic situation and we offer our sincere condolences to Caitlin’s family.”